Get Lost...

[bubbles]

I went to visit Staci yesterday. Just me, alone, no sense of direction accompanying me. Never did see her new place. I did make it to Sonora, did some shopping, saw Cheaper By The Dozen. Then I headed back to Yosemite. I thought that heading in the opposite direction from it would get me there quicker, but what do you know, I was wrong.

On the bright side, if I hadn't gotten so lost, I would never have come across the Glory Hole Recreation Area. I shit you not. Shortly afterward, I saw the Glory Hole sport shop. It had gone out of business. I can't imagine why. It was the first building I'd seen for a good long while; I was ready to buy a whiffle ball set just to ease the monotony. Then I drove into Frogtown and saw that Big Melons storage had been changed to New Melons Storage. What do you want to bet the new melons are even bigger?

I stopped at a gas station to ask directions and found that, not only was Yosemite not on any of their maps, but apparently they had never heard of the place. I called Staci but she still wasn't picking up her phone. The initial not-picking-up being the reason I headed out to her place without directions. So I called home and told my husband that I was lost, but okay, and would check in shortly. I then drove around fairly aimlessly for a while. I had the sneaking suspicion that I was enjoying all this far too much.

I eventually came across some semblance of civilization again. In fact, it looked so much like my starting point in Sonora that I almost screamed. For a moment, I was sure that I had made a giant loop. Then I realized that it was only the strip mall along one side of the road that was identical(disturbing as that is). The other side of the road was "historic someplace-or-other".

I asked for directions in three different places, and they all assured me that I was going the right way. I didn't see how this was possible, as I was headed west, the same direction I went on leaving Yosemite. Then again, who asks for directions and then argues with them? I fought back my testosterone and did as I was told.

I wound up in Fairfield, about four hours from home, less than an hour from my mom's house. I called my husband and he talked me into visiting the fam while I was in the neighborhood. Sigh. I could have picked him up and brought him along in less time than I spent touring Bumfuck. Oh, well. I spotted a 99 cent store, grabbed a couple gifts and a change of undies, and showed up on Mom's doorstep.

Somehow I talked myself into bringing my brother-in-law and my niece and nephew back with me. I'll be at work pretty much the whole time they're in Yosemite, but my husband will be off. I guess that's fair. I visit with them here, he visits with them there, he drives them back so we don't get stuck on the road for all eternity in some kind of Twilight Zone loop where no one has ever heard of anyplace you want to go, and everybody's happy.



In conclusion (as I finally pause for breath)... you might not hear from me for a while. Between the 6-year-old, the 8-year old, and the 16-year-old, I'm likely to be a bit distracted. See y'all in a week!