I just started reading Russell Banks’ The Sweet Hereafter. I read the following line, and I had what might be a revelation. Or it might be sleep deprivation. Anyway, it’s a thought.

“Because we [men] are secretly afraid of them, we tend to see women as having bodies that are at least as large as our own.”

So here is my thought process; take it as it comes . . .

Skinny women are attractive because women appear to men to be larger than they are. Because men are “secretly afraid” of women. Like Shallow Hal in reverse, they don’t realize how tiny these women are in relation to themselves until they hold up an article of clothing, a ring, a slipper. Initially, every woman is perceived to be at least the size of the man viewing her.
Skinny women are naturally less intimidating and therefore more attractive. Not only to insecure men, either. It’s similar to the warped body image women have of themselves because of the comparisons they make to unusually thin female images, i.e. models. Once again, it’s reversed. Men don’t see women accurately, at least in terms of size, because they fail to compare themselves.
To compound the confusion, women with slender or boyish figures appear younger, which is not only more attractive in terms of fertility. It also makes these women appear non-threatening in a culture which supports secure, mature women to “empower” themselves. Which many women use as a justification to exploit and/or dominate men. The old “turnabout is fair play” argument. Except from this perspective, it is not necessary that the tables be turned on the individual, or even the generation, which originally perpetrated the exploitation (much like the framework many African Americans have created for themselves).
If the mode of domination were pure, perhaps it would not scare off so many men. Certainly, the “average” Modern Man wants a self-confident woman, a woman who can take charge when the situation warrants it. But the domination I’m speaking of is not just laying claim to one’s fair share of power in a relationship. In fact, for the most part, it’s not even about power. It’s about punishment. Many so-called “empowered” women take pleasure in hurting and humiliating men.
Of course, many, perhaps most of those women are slender and attractive. It’s part of their power. It’s what makes them so dangerous. Regardless, size represents power, in a fundamental way. As long as men make this connection unconsciously, a large woman will be seen as fearsome and undesirable, while an aggressive woman will be seen as highly sexual and attractive. Given, of course, that she is thin.

Have I ever mentioned that I miss school? I do. Like really a lot.

From: [identity profile] coffeesnob.livejournal.com


Aw, now you've gone and made me miss school. I mean, as a student. It's not as enlightening as the instructor. It doesn't help that you're talking about some of my research emphasis. Power...women's studies...add some aspect of the media and you've got the start of my dissertation.

From: [identity profile] bubbles79.livejournal.com


Yes, I would imagine that taking the same class over and over isn't quite the same . . .
Dissertation? Tell me more! And while you're talking, get me a cup of coffee. Damn, I'm tired. It must be all the not sleeping.

From: [identity profile] gradeafan.livejournal.com


hmmm....I always thought it was because I'm pretty tall. I'm certainly not a skinny little thing, but I'm as tall as or taller than most of the men I see on a regular basis. And I always feel more self-confident when I'm wearing my higher heeled shoes.

g

From: [identity profile] coffeesnob.livejournal.com


*hands bubbles a cup of coffee*

There's not much to tell - I'm only gathering ideas. I'm kinda doing it backwards - I picked my method and I'm trying to find something to apply it to. I'm using Foucault and his work on power dynamics.

From: [identity profile] bubbles79.livejournal.com


What's because you're pretty tall? How do you think men respond to you?
Sorry if I'm a little slow. I'm waving my sleep-deprivation flag this morning.

From: [identity profile] bubbles79.livejournal.com


By the by, I need your street addresses, please. Both of you. Your Xmas gifts are burning a hole in my . . . well, shelf. Anyway. Pretty please? You can email it to me.

From: [identity profile] gradeafan.livejournal.com


Heh...sorry I was just following your thoughts there. You know how it said most men think women are larger, just the same size as them? Well when I'm going to a meeting with my attorney or CPA clients who are all men, I make sure to wear my high heels so that I can look them in the eye, so I'm not so intimidated by them. I feel like they take me more seriously or at least listen when I'm talking. And before when I worked at the CPA firm and had to deal with them on a daily basis I even noticed they treated me better on the days when I was taller. [shrug]

g

From: [identity profile] bubbles79.livejournal.com


Hmmm. Yes, that's interesting. My thought processes are whirring again, factoring that in. Thanks for waking me up!
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